Apex Mountain on The Rewatchables
47:08 – 49:56… in one. The bathroom's like right on top of that. You can hear every noise in the bathroom. There's just no way he's going up there. Not ideal. I, uh, is this Apex Mountain for IBS? I was thinking about that. It might be. Could be up there. I can't remember a better IBS scene. There's another character right on the tip of my tongue who had IBS, but yeah, I definitely learned about something like this from movies. This is a, this is pretty gross. Yeah. The bathroom disaster. It's not, I'm not a huge like bathroom humor guy. As you know, I love, I love, uh. You'll have a juvenile sense of humor. I love juvenile …
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That's my biggest nitpick of the movie. You're like, oh, cool. Oh, it's a, it's a two room studio where you've been in those apartments. I lived in one. The bathroom's like right on top of that. You can hear every noise in the bathroom. There's just no way he's going up there. Not ideal. I, uh, is this Apex Mountain for IBS? I was thinking about that. It might be. Could be up there. I can't remember a better IBS scene. There's another character right on the tip of my tongue who had IBS, but yeah, I definitely learned about something like this from movies. This is a, this is pretty gross. Yeah. The bathroom disaster. It's not, I'm not a huge like bathroom humor guy. As you know, I love, I love, uh. You'll have a juvenile sense of humor. I love juvenile shit. Not a gross sense of humor. And I just feel like every version of a bathroom scene has been done at this point. So even in 2004, this felt a tiny bit tired, but it is funny. It's pretty funny. What if I was like, Bill, I'm a huge toilet humor guy. Would that just be the biggest zag of all time? Top nine toilet scenes. I think it's okay. It's fine. It feels a little, like you said, redundant. So there's something about, there's something about Mary scene in the bathroom with the zipper is, uh, just legendary material followed up by the earlobe later on in the movie. Like that is the funniest of the funny. Um, the, this one is okay. It's just like, oh, you shit in front of a girl. Dumb and, it's very similar to the Dumb and Dumber one. It is. Just not as good. It is. I like that you said the earlobe scene and not the cum shot scene. I like that you, you went PG instead of R. So it's a good, good edit. Is this a family program? Well, not really. The salsa date I have. The, just quickly, we get more hoops. We just thrown in. It's Iceman! I don't know why they haven't put like the 15 minute unedited Hoffman playing basketball cut. They should air it at MSG during playoff games. I would be fired up. Yeah, seriously. Raindrop! They should. Every time Brunson drops one, yeah. Um, Pauly finds the list. Just good drama. We'll get into some of the issues with that later. And then, uh, the two last big rewatchable scenes. Jesus Christ Superstar. You knew we had to see that one being performed. Goes terribly, but leads to the dad's big speech. Yeah. It's not about what happened in the past or what you think might happen in the future. It's about the ride for Christ's sake. Like, there's no point in going through all this crap if you're not going to enjoy the ride. And you know what? When you least expect something great, when you least expect that something great might come along. Something better than you even planned for. All of a sudden, there's like real wisdom in this movie. I totally agree with that. It's all about the ride. This is what you said to me right before we started The Ringer. You know? You were like, just think. If you stick it out for nine years, we can do the top nine toilet humor movies of all time. Because it's all about the ride.
85:33 – 89:50… and landing in the Stiller's face so it could smack against it, and they did 12 takes. Never say Ben Stiller doesn't want it. He really wants it. He wants it. Apex Mountain. Ben Stiller, no. No. Aniston. What is Ben Stiller's Apex Mountain? I mean, it's got to be Meet the Parents. Wow. Yeah. Are you on Meet the Parents? Yeah, it's on the list. Didn't Hamburg co-write that? I think he did. Yeah. That's how they, he worked with Stiller a bunch. Yeah. He wrote a lot of those movies. Not Zoolander? I don't think so. No, it's Meet the Parents because it's coming off of There's Something About Mary, then Meet the …
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sweat, and then they had him jumping into a trampoline and landing in the Stiller's face so it could smack against it, and they did 12 takes. Never say Ben Stiller doesn't want it. He really wants it. He wants it. Apex Mountain. Ben Stiller, no. No. Aniston. What is Ben Stiller's Apex Mountain? I mean, it's got to be Meet the Parents. Wow. Yeah. Are you on Meet the Parents? Yeah, it's on the list. Didn't Hamburg co-write that? I think he did. Yeah. That's how they, he worked with Stiller a bunch. Yeah. He wrote a lot of those movies. Not Zoolander? I don't think so. No, it's Meet the Parents because it's coming off of There's Something About Mary, then Meet the Parents, then he can do whatever he wants. Okay. Aniston, no. Hoffman, no, but I think it's, we're getting close. Capote to Mission Impossible 3. Yep. Agree. Spanking, no. Debra Messing, probably yes. What year did Will and Grace start? It's in the 2000s. Remember when like 29 million people watched Will and Grace? Wasn't it like an obscene member? I never watched one moment of it. I still don't know what the plot was. You don't know what the plot was? Was she Will or Grace? She was Grace. I'm kidding. I know she was Grace. So that show ran from It's like 98 or something. 98 through 2006. Wow. I missed every episode. Komodo Dragons, Apex Mountain? Uh, no. Ben Stiller Bathroom Mishaps in a movie. No. White Chocolate. Is it Jason Williams? No, it's J Will. It's gotta be. White Chocolate was a problem. Yeah, he was a problem. He was. He really was a problem. White Chocolate was really literally a problem. What about, where did he go after Sacramento when he was like, he's, oh, the heat. It was like, he's playing the game the right way now. Yeah. Memphis and Miami. Memphis and Miami, yeah. Throw pillows, possible Apex Mountain. Uh. I hate throw pillows. Big passion of my mom. She loves a throw pillow. Loves throw pillows and wine. How many pillows are on your bed right now? On my bed? Yeah. Less than 10. I'll tell you right now, it's six on mine. Six. We've got a king-sized bed. Yeah. Two, two, two. Throw pillows. I think that's the math. No throw pillows. They're like the big pillows. They're like heavy pillow and then a regular pillow. Big pillow, regular pillow. Big pillow, regular pillow. That's the math. You don't need more than that. You probably don't need that many. Six is good. My mom is giant pillow, throw pillow, the mini throw. No. When people do the mini throw pillows, you're just a sociopath at that point. No, you should be jailed. Yeah. Yeah. IBS? Possible. Apex? Possible. Just for all living humans or for a movie? In a movie. Yeah. Possible. It was early stage IBS. Jimmy Kimmel was the first person I'd ever met who had IBS. Wow. I've heard him talk about it a lot. Yeah. Did work with him when he was in the bathroom working on his monologue and putting the toilet for a half hour talking to him through the door. So that was my first IBS experience. He's talked about it. I'm not telling secrets. Yeah, that's great. Salsa? That was me not commenting on Jimmy Kimmel's IBS. Good non-comment. Salsa. There's probably been better salsa moments. There's probably been better moments of the ferret. Salsa is like, I don't know, like Save the Last Dance or Dirty Dancing or something like that. Hippo monologues, probably yes. I don't remember. You think this is the number one hippo monologue of all time? I don't remember another hippo monologue, yeah. You must be like the hippo. Hippo. All right, it's time. Wow. Cruise or Hanks? This is the best category in the podcast now. This is the toughest one we've had. Each one I've had a lean. I think you can make a case for both. I think Hanks absolutely could have played this, but I think Cruise trying to play Ruben, the answer always seems to be it's so much funnier if Cruise plays blank. That's it. Because Hanks could have made this movie in 1995. He could have been Ruben in 1995. I think the answer is Hanks. Why would Tom Cruise be Ruben? Tom Cruise as Ruben is iconic. He would just never have done it. He never wants to be the loser in a movie. He wouldn't have done it. Hanks would have happily done it. Maybe that's what's been missing from Cruise's last decade is John Hamburg, the comic stylings of John Hamburg.
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